Another One Goes Tonight Read online

  “But I do. We want to know all about this emergency.” He took a couple of steps towards the doorway and there was a momentary stand-off. “Don’t even think about obstructing us. It won’t go down well.”

  The moustache twitched but its owner backed down, as Diamond had calculated. They were led into a room that may have been built as a bedroom but had no bed. It was better described as an observatory. In front of a large picture window were two cameras on tripods and a telescope mounted on a revolving dais with a seat that also rotated, like a gun position on a warship.

  “Well equipped.”

  “It’s my hobby.”

  Diamond stepped up to the window and the view was every bit as spectacular as Bellerby had claimed. The houses along here had been built at the top of the escarpment overlooking the river and with the naked eye you could see much of northern Bath, the tiers of crescents rising to the dark green of Lansdown on the opposite side.

  “Stunning. You had an eye to the location when you moved here.”

  “It was a factor, yes.”

  “And you didn’t expect to look out on a buck-naked man? Neither would I. Very off-putting. Where was he when you first spotted him?”

  “Down there to your right,” Bellerby said after some hesitation.

  “Down where?”

  He pointed.

  “The Georgian lido?” You wouldn’t have guessed Diamond spoke with the authority of a man who had been reminded of its existence less than an hour ago. “They’re spending millions of lottery money refurbishing it, aren’t they? It will surely become a tourist attraction—the oldest open-air swimming pool in Britain, I was told. I daresay the naked man had sneaked in for an early morning dip.”

  Bellerby said nothing.

  “Rather him than me,” Diamond went on. “Too damn cold this time of year. Crazy people do it all the year round. I worked in London years ago and they used to break the ice on the Serpentine to have their daily swim. Is he one of your neighbours?”

  “I’ve no idea,” Bellerby said, tight-lipped.

  “You’d know if he was. With that powerful telescope you must have got a good sight of him and all his particulars.”

  “I wasn’t using the telescope at the time.”

  “I forgot. You had the night-vision binoculars. The image wouldn’t have been so sharp. Have you seen him before—or any other secret bathers?”

  “No.”

  “Still, it could become a regular thing. You don’t want that sort of how-d’ye-do going on in this beautiful valley. Is there local opposition to what’s happening to the old lido?”

  After a long pause, as if aware he was being drawn into dangerous territory, Bellerby said, “Some of us aren’t overjoyed.”

  “I’m with you there,” Diamond said. “Trippers, people hiring the place for parties, booze, loud music and God knows what else going on in your own back yard. It’s sure to be a pain. But if you try and stop it now, you’re up against the great and the good of the city. There’s a trust and all this money being invested.”

  Bellerby started backtracking. “I don’t know why you’re making an issue of this.”

  “Because I need to understand why a naked man was a full-blown emergency. Some people might treat him as a laugh, or at worst a blot on the landscape. You called 999 and asked for the police.”

  “It was the proper thing to do. Gross indecency. There are laws about that.”

  “Against people exposing themselves? Yes, indeed.”

  “He could be a sex maniac.”

  “That’s an expression I haven’t heard for years.”

  “A pervert, then. A danger to the public.”

  “A 999 call?”

  “How else am I supposed to report it? You know very well that calling the local police station is no help at all in an emergency. This was going on while I was watching. In a short time he’d be away.”

  Diamond controlled his contempt. This was the justification that put impossible strains on the emergency service. People didn’t trust the first line of help, be it police or general medical practice, to react effectively to their small crises. In a society where so much of life is controlled by the touch of a button they felt entitled to instant action. And then they complained when the response times got longer and longer.

  “Where exactly was he when you first spotted him?”

  “Down by the pool. It was flagrant nudity.”

  “Was he alone at the time?”

  “He appeared to be. That doesn’t excuse it.”

  “No one’s excusing it, Mr. Bellerby. What happened next?”

  “He left the lido and started up the footpath. That was when I called 999.”

  “And then?”

  “I continued to observe him so that when the police arrived I could say exactly where he was.”

  “Sensible.” This buffoon had to be humoured to tell his story in full.

  “I followed his progress all the way up the footpath towards Hampton Row.”

  “Still without his kit on?”

  He cleared his throat. “By then he’d put on some sort of tracksuit.”

  This was getting more and more farcical. “He’d dressed before leaving the lido?”

  “Yes. I kept him in my sights as long as possible.”

  “And when he reached Hampton Row you dashed into the front room to see where he went. Is that right?”

  “I wouldn’t say ‘dashed.’ I was perfectly calm.”

  “Put it this way: you moved directly there. Did he come into view?”

  “No. Unfortunately there’s a bend in the road. I can’t see Hampton Row from here. That’s where the footpath comes out. I expected he would turn this way, but it seems he didn’t. I can only imagine he lives in one of the terraced houses along there.”

  Ingeborg, who had listened with admirable self-control, said, “Or he could have turned up Rockliffe Avenue.”

  “I think not. I can see that turn from here. Well, from my front gate.”

  “So you went outside?” Diamond said.

  “To meet the police—as I expected. I told them to come here.”

  “But the incident wasn’t here. It was down at the lido.”

  “Quite true. But if they were going to make an arrest, they’d have to do it up here. He was already climbing the hill when I made the call.”

  There was a plodding logic in this, but Diamond had long since lost any sympathy he may have had. Somehow, he had to rein himself in, because this absurd little man could still have vital information. “Think carefully, Mr. Bellerby. What happened next?”

  “There was a fearful bang—”

  “Before that,” Diamond cut him short. “We’re here about the events leading up to the crash. Did you hear the approach of the police car? Were they using their siren?”

  “I believe not. I would remember, wouldn’t I?”

  A question impossible for Diamond to answer. “I’ll take that as no. How about their beacon lights?”

  “Yes, I saw them flashing, I’m certain. The thought went through my head that this must be the police car answering my call, and then there was the screech of brakes and that almighty bang and the lights weren’t flashing any longer.”

  “You heard the crash but didn’t actually see it?”

  He nodded. “I was too far off.”

  “By your front gate?”

  “I told you.”

  “How long for?”

  “I don’t know. I wasn’t timing myself.”

  “Ten minutes?”

  “About that.”

  “This is important,” Diamond said. “I know the crash is strongest in your memory but during the ten-minute wait did anyone else come by?”

  Bellerby frowned and then fingered the moustache as if it might aid hi
s thought process. “Yes, there was someone, an elderly man on a tricycle.”

  “Before the crash? This could be helpful. Which way did he come?”

  “From the Hampton Row direction. It was still quite dark but I made sure I got a sight of him in case he was the naked man. I’m certain he wasn’t. He was definitely older and dressed differently as well, in a jacket and deerstalker hat. Heaven only knows where he’d been or where he was going.”

  Finally something useful.

  Diamond pressed for more details. “Was he travelling fast?”

  “Not at all. The tricycle must have had some kind of motor, because he wasn’t pedalling, but you could have kept up at a quick walk. His steering wasn’t the best, either. He was wandering off course as if he wasn’t used to riding the thing.”

  “Did he have lights?”

  “I’m sure he did, front and back, the sort that wink intermittently.”

  “Did he see you as he went by?”

  “He was too busy trying to stay in control. I don’t think he noticed me at all.”

  “But you definitely saw him before the car crash? How long before?”

  “Not long.”

  “I need a more precise answer than that.”

  “Three or four minutes, at least. I assume he got through before it happened.”

  “You’re wrong about that,” Diamond said. “An elderly man was found a short time ago, unconscious.”

  “Oh my word. Nobody said.”

  “He and his tricycle were thrown high up on to the embankment.”

  “Shocking.”

  “You say you didn’t recognise him?”

  “It was almost dark and I didn’t get a proper look at his face, but I can’t recollect anyone from round here riding a tricycle. Poor fellow. Will he recover?”

  A fatuous question. Diamond glanced at his colleagues. “We’ve heard enough for now, I think.”

  On the drive back to Keynsham, where Bath CID was now inconveniently housed, Halliwell spoke for all of them. “What a toerag. He doesn’t get it, does he? Because he made that stupid bloody call, Aaron Green was killed and two others are in intensive care.”

  “People like him have no idea of consequences,” Ingeborg said. “They’re so wrapped up in themselves they don’t think of the risks each time there’s a call-out.”

  “I can’t make out why he got so uptight about a nude bather,” Halliwell said. “It’s obvious he’s some kind of perv himself with his telescope and binoculars. Studying wildlife, for Christ’s sake.”

  “There’s more to it,” Diamond said. “He has an agenda. He’d like to stop the lido project. Did you see the glint in his eyes when I talked about parties and loud music? Any mud he can throw their way, he will.”

  “Is that all it was about?”

  “It’s no help to him if he’s the only one who sees the naked flesh. He wants maximum publicity, so he calls 999.”

  “After the guy has got dressed and left the place. Pointless.”

  “No,” Diamond said. “He had a point. He wanted our lot involved, to get it on record. He could write to the papers or go on local radio and say the lido is being used for nude bathing and the police were called and unless something is done about it, they’ll soon be having sex parties and orgies.”

  “How do I join?” Halliwell said.

  Ingeborg rolled her eyes.

  “His coffee was rubbish, too,” Diamond said. “Let’s stop off at the Verona.”

  In Keynsham police centre, Georgina, the ACC, had told everyone she wished to speak to Diamond the instant he returned. He took a relaxed view and stretched the instant to almost an hour. It had been a long morning.

  “This mysterious man on a tricycle,” she said when he finally went upstairs and reported. “Who is he?”

  “‘Who was he?’ may be the right question.”

  “No, no. I’m getting regular updates from the resuscitation bay. He’s clinging on to life.”

  He perked up. “He survived my CPR?”

  “Your prompt action may have saved his life. If he does come through this, he’ll owe you a debt of gratitude.”

  “I don’t want anyone owing me anything, thanks.”

  “Don’t be so modest, Peter. I gather you found him on a piece of wasteland where nobody else had thought to check.”

  “They would have got round to it,” he said. “Pure chance on my part. I was thinking a fox or a deer may have jumped down and caused the crash. There’s an iron fence all the way along the top of the bank, so that’s unlikely.”

  “Getting back to my earlier question, what do we know about him?”

  “Very little. My working theory is that he caused the crash. A witness says he was riding unsteadily.”

  “Someone saw?”

  “No, ma’am. They only saw the old man going in that direction.”

  “Did they know him?”

  “No.”

  “Wasn’t he carrying any form of identity?”

  “I was too busy pounding his chest to go through his pockets.”

  “The hospital doesn’t seem to have found anything.”

  “He’s a Sherlock Holmes impersonator, going by what he was wearing,” he said. “Someone will know. People like him get noticed.”

  “The worst of it is that this brings a serious new dimension to your investigation,” Georgina said. “Deeply alarming.”

  “You’re wishing I hadn’t found him?”

  “I’m happy for his sake, not for ours. It was bad enough that one of our officers lost his life. With a member of the public critically injured it’s almost certain to be referred to the Independent Police Complaints Commission.”

  “Does that mean I’m free to return to normal duties?”

  “Quite the reverse. You must devote every minute of your time to finding out what really happened. We’re going to find ourselves under scrutiny. At the earliest opportunity you must get a statement from the driver.”

  “Difficult. He’s dead.”

  She dismissed her mistake with an impatient, angry sigh. “The other one, then.”

  “Lew Morgan is still in intensive care.”

  “I know. I called the hospital in the last twenty minutes. But at some stage he’ll be able to talk.”

  “We can hope.”

  “See that you’re the first in. Did you meet the collision investigator?”

  “Dessie? Yes.”

  “Make sure he’s on side. We don’t want conflicting versions.”

  “That’s unlikely to happen. Dessie is dealing with the mechanical stuff, recording everything. Scene plans, vehicle components, that sort of thing. He’s very young.”

  She saw danger in the last remark. “Don’t underrate him. I have it on good authority that he misses nothing.”

  Diamond thought of the crashed tricycle and its rider lying unnoticed for three hours but kept the thought to himself.

  “He’s a civilian, of course,” Georgina added, “so don’t be tempted to pull rank with him. He’s with the top forensic road collision investigation company and they have the highest opinion of him.”

  “We’ll sort things out between us,” he said.

  “What will you do next?”

  “Depends.”

  “Depends on what?”

  “How soon Lew Morgan is fit to talk.”

  4

  Diamond slept fitfully, troubled by recurring images of the old man’s grey, lifeless face.

  In the morning, he drove—with even more care than usual—to the Royal United Hospital instead of straight to work. After much badgering of the ward sister responsible for Lew Morgan’s care, he was told he might be allowed a short visit after the consultant had seen the patient.

  It wasn’t so simple.

 
Extra treatment—whatever that meant—was prescribed, meaning a wait of at least an hour. Instead of sitting outside and staring at a wall he had the good idea of checking on the progress, if any, of the tricyclist. He located the Critical Care unit quickly, not far from the room where Lew Morgan was being treated. Understandably, he wasn’t allowed inside, even with his police ID.

  “What are his chances?” he asked the one nurse willing to be questioned.

  She held her hand palm downwards and made a quivering movement.

  “Not the best, then?”

  “He’s old. He must be over seventy, quite well nourished, but the trauma he’s been through would test someone half his age. Apparently—don’t ask me why—he was lying unconscious for some hours before he was brought in. There are other injuries from the fall and we haven’t concluded how serious they are.”

  “He’s still with us. That’s something.”

  She didn’t comment, just widened her eyes a fraction.

  He took this to mean the patient was clinically alive thanks to the treatment he was getting. Whether he showed vital signs of his own was less certain.

  Of course it would aid the investigation if the old boy pulled through, but at this minute Diamond wasn’t thinking about the investigation. He passionately wanted the man to survive.

  “Did you discover his name?” he asked the nurse. “I was wondering if you found a wallet or a card-case in his pockets.”

  “There wasn’t anything like that,” she said. “Some money and a set of keys that Sister has put in the safe. No, he’s our mystery patient until somebody misses him and comes looking.”

  He went outside and called CID. Ingeborg was in.

  “I’ve been given a statement from the control room, guv,” she said. “It’s a log of all their exchanges with Delta Three on the night of the crash.”

  “Good. I asked for that. Anything of special interest?”

  “Not really but it gives a picture of the areas they visited. They arrested two men from Swindon stealing lead from a church roof in Julian Road and brought them in to the custody suite. They were still here when the call came in about the naked man. It was almost the end of their turn.”

  She also had a list from Dessie of the items found in the handlebar bag: binoculars, digital camera, a few tools for the trike, an Ordnance Survey map of Bath, a vacuum flask containing the dregs of some tea and a plastic sandwich box but with only some cake crumbs and a banana skin inside. And a plastic vase.